


The South Park Mafia

by UrVeggieM8



Category: South Park
Genre: Betrayal, Deception, Game sesh, Gen, Hijinks & Shenanigans, Implied/Referenced Character Death, It's just a game, Lies, Mafia/Werewolf, Nobody dies for real, Reader-Interactive, Strategy & Tactics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-26
Updated: 2020-01-11
Packaged: 2021-02-26 05:22:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 16,121
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21964270
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UrVeggieM8/pseuds/UrVeggieM8
Summary: The boys are bored over the school holidays and Jimmy suggests a game that they haven't played before: Mafia (also known as Werewolf in some circles)! It's a game of lies, deception, betrayal, strategy, and bro-ship! Basically Game of Thrones minus the medieval setting, right?Essentially, the boys get together to play a game of Mafia and it goes exactly as you'd expect it would. Lies are told, betrayals abound, and the town just can't seem to get their shit together!Written so that you, the reader, can also choose to speculate about who has what role and who is/isn't trustworthy!
Relationships: Implied Creek but not much else, Relationships aren't the focus of this!, Too much heartbreak otherwise lol
Comments: 4
Kudos: 29





	1. Before you proceed any further

**Author's Note:**

> This chapter is a preface to how the entire fic is structured. Please PLEASE do not skip it if you don't want to spoil yourself unintentionally
> 
> With that said, hope you like this fic! Merry (late) Christmas to the fandom!
> 
> This fic is dedicated to my friend skerpandoodles who I met on the Hell Park Discord. Thank you for being there at a time when I really needed a friend, you inspire me with your positivity! Also without your support and encouragement, I doubt this fic would ever have been finished!

Cannot emphasise enough, please read this chapter if you don't want to spoil yourself unintentionally! Like Cartman would say: "GUYS, I AM SO SERIOUSLY RIGHT NOW!"

I have written this mafia fic so that readers are able to play along (i.e. you know as much information as the boys do and can do some deduction work for yourself) or have the solutions the whole time (i.e. you are omnipresent and can observe the strategy hijinks and all that).

Thus, the way this fic is structured is not linear.

 **Chapters that have solutions will come immediately after "play-along" chapters**. If you DO NOT want to be spoiled, please go to every SECOND chapter instead of proceeding to the next chapter like you usually would. I will also put in the chapter title and author's notes whether it is a "play-along" or "solutions" chapter so please pay attention to those if you don't want the solutions. 


	2. Prologue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is neither a "play-along" or "solutions" chapter. This one is just for setting the scene a bit. 
> 
> Just to clarify, the prologue takes place while they're chatting online but the rest of the story takes place while they're face to face.

**Clyde** : yay dudes holidays are here!!!!

 **Jimmy** : couldn’t come soon enough fellas huh?

 **Kyle** : what are you guys doing over the holidays? 

**Token** : going to my parents holiday house in cali. but that’s not until about a month from now

 **Stan** : oh cool cali! nice dude (y) 

**Clyde** : make sure you get some photos of hot babes in bikinis! 

**Cartman** : oh that’s cool token. that’s real cool. i’m actually going to be doing something even better than that but idk what it is yet because my mom said it was a surprise

 **Kyle** : no-one cares fatass

 **Cartman** : ay! don’t call me fatass you fucking jew! 

**Butters** : well i think you’re a real lucky guy to be doing something even cooler than going to cali, eric! why i must say i’m a little jealous of you myself, but i hope you have lots of fun :):) in fact, i hope you have fun for all the rest of us too 

**Token** : don’t believe him butters. he’s making it up

 **Cartman** : guys i’m seriously! i’m not making this up! i’ve always been super trustworthy! I’M THE MOST TRUSTWORTHY ONE HERE! 

**Kyle** : since when have you been trustworthy?

 **Cartman** : since like ever. what does a jew know about trustworthy? jews are the least trustworthy people in the entire universe! 

**Craig** : why is the fatass even in this chat. can we kick him permanently? 

**Cartman** : screw you craig! why are you even in this chat? you never post anything so why are you even here? take your gay faggot ass out of here and go make out with your boyfriend bitch 

**Craig** : i posted just then. and again right now

 **Jimmy** : sorry eric but we don’t want spam in this chat

 **Cartman** : guys i was the one who said there should be rules in the chat in the first place you can’t remove meeeeeeeee  
_*eric has been removed from the chat*_

 **Kyle** : thank you jimmy! no idea why we didn’t ask you to do that earlier

 **Jimmy** : no problem kyle :) so fellas, any other plans for the holidays? 

**Butters** : oh well, i guess nothing much really. i would make plans but my parents have grounded me for not going to school 

**Stan** : you mean you cut class? 

**Butters** : no i didn’t cut class :( they grounded me because it’s the school holidays and that means that i’ll be taking time off from school and that time is valuable time that could be spent learning. i need to shape up, fellas

 **Clyde** : sucks to be you. though tbh i don’t really have plans for the holidays either. i think i have a date with some chick lined up sometime? i can’t remember

 **Kyle** : you don’t even know her name? 

**Clyde** : i do, i just forget right now 

**Craig** : dude that’s so gross

 **Stan** : wendy wanted to go out sometime too. I’m not looking forward to it though tbh

 **Token** : same with nichole. i mean, i AM looking forward to it but it’d also be fun to do something with all of us you know? 

**Kyle** : yeah that’d be cool! like a boys only thing

 **Stan** : what about a games and chill sesh? That’s pretty easy. just come over to my house and bring games and we can order kfc or something

 **Kenny** : kfc fuck yeah i’m in! 

**Jimmy** : me too! actually stan, there’s this game that i’ve been really into lately and i think you fellas will like it as well. it’s called mafia

 **Craig** : what’s it about? 

**Jimmy** : well it’s kind of a cross between a social deduction game and a role-playing game. you have to be good at deception and decent at strategy as well. if you’re a good team player, all the better! 

**Clyde** : is it hard to play? 

**Jimmy** : not at all clyde! anyone can pick it up. and the best thing about it is that it doesn’t even need a board!

 **Token** : it sounds cool. how many players do we need? 

**Jimmy** : if all of us come, we’ll have the perfect number for an exciting game! 

**Kyle** : even the fatass? 

**Jimmy** : actually kyle, eric would be perfect for this game. it’d make things really exciting! hmm, guess i better add him again

 **Butters** : fellas i’d love to come but i’m grounded remember? 

_*eric has been added to the chat*_  
**Cartman** : screw you jimmy for kicking me! screw you kahl you dirty jew! and screw you guys! also goddammit butters, is it really so hard to just sneak out you pussy fag? 

**Butters** : well i guess… but what if i get caught? i don’t wanna get more grounded than i already am :( 

**Stan** : that’s why you don’t get caught. okay so how’s tomorrow for everyone? can anyone not do tomorrow? 

_*tweek is now online*_  
**Tweek** : so many notifications gahh! what are you guys talking about? 

**Craig** : tweek, games and chill at stan’s tomorrow. can you come? 

**Tweek** : i need to check if i’m working but I should be fine i think

 **Stan** : okay so it looks like tomorrow’s good for everyone? then you better all show up if we’re gonna try this new game. come over at lunchtime 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And so a mob has formed...


	3. Rules of the game: play-along

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a "play-along" chapter. If you want solutions, please click ahead to the next chapter.   
> Just for clarification, the boys are face-to-face now.

**jimmy** : So who here already knows how to play?

**kyle** : We’re all new to this Jimmy. No-one knows.

**jimmy** : Okay so there are two teams: the evil mafia, and the good townspeople.

**cartman** : Well we all know which team Kahl’s on then.

**kyle** : Shut up fat boy, more like we all know which team you’re on!

**jimmy** : The teams are randomly decided, guys.

**cartman** : _*under his breath*_ It’s _**OBVIOUS**_ Kahl’s mafia, guys…

**stan** : Okay so there are two teams that are randomly decided, what else?

**jimmy** : Nine people are playing, so there will be two mafia and seven townspeople.

**craig** : Wait, nine? But there’s ten of us here?

**jimmy** : Yes, someone has to moderate the game to make sure no-one cheats.

**cartman** : Ah yes, a moderator. Good idea Jimmy. _*glares at Kyle*_

**kyle** : _*rolls his eyes*_

**jimmy** : Since I’m the only one who knows how to play. I’ll moderate the first game. Now listen up fellas, because the next information is very important. The mafia will know who each other are, but the townspeople will not know who anyone are except for themselves.

**tweek** : OH GOD! So the mafia could be anyone?! 

**jimmy** : Yes Tweek, if you are a townsperson, then until you find out who the mafia are, the mafia really could be anyone.

**tweek** : GAHHHH!!! THIS IS TOO MUCH PRESSURE!

**jimmy** : To help the odds of the townspeople, there also are some special town roles: the Cop and the Medic.

**token** : So there are two types of townspeople is what you’re saying. The special ones and the normal ones?

**jimmy** : Exactly, Token! Okay, so is everyone following so far? No-one is confused, right?  
_*no-one is confused yet*_  
Good, so now I can tell you how the game is played. The game is played in two phases: night and day. In the night phase, the mafia will choose someone to kill.

**tweek** : KILL?!! JESUS CHRIST!!! 

**kenny** : are you for real?!

**jimmy** : Not kill for real. Just kill as in that person is out of the game but can still watch. So, the mafia choose someone to kill in the night and in the day phase, the townspeople have to decide on someone who might be mafia and execute that person. The executed person is also out of the game but can still watch. The game is over when the number of townspeople left is the same as the number of mafia left, or if the townspeople correctly execute all the mafia.

**clyde** : Okay, _**NOW**_ I’m confused.

**jimmy** : Don’t worry Clyde, it’s my job as the moderator to guide you through the game so don’t worry if it seems like it’s too much to remember now.

**butters** : Ah, what about those special town roles you were talking about before? 

**jimmy** : Ah yes! Thanks for reminding me, Butters! So to help the townspeople in their fight against the mafia, the special roles get to do certain things in the night phase. The Cop can check one person every night to see if they’re a townsperson or mafia. And the Medic can choose one person every night to save. So if the mafia chose someone to kill, but the Medic also chose to save that person, then they will not die. The Medic can choose to save themselves if they want but they can’t save the same person twice in a row. Also, the townspeople do not know who the people with the special roles are and neither do the mafia.

**cartman** : Well all right then. Gentlemen, I implore you now, nominate me as your Cop. I know that it’s a position that holds a lot of responsibility, but rest assured that I will use my power to lead the good town to victory *cough cough* and eliminate all Jews *cough cough*

**jimmy** : Sorry Eric, but no-one can nominate you as anything because the special roles are randomly decided too.

**cartman** : Goddammit…

**jimmy** : That’s all you need to know folks. Should we draw from a hat to decide who plays as what role?

**stan** : Yeah, you can use my hat.

**jimmy** : Do you have paper anywhere? 

**stan** : I’ll go get some.

_*later, when all the roles have been put into stan’s hat and they’ve all drawn their roles*_  
**jimmy** : Alright fellas, look at your slip of paper and DO NOT show anyone else what role you are.

_*they all look at their role*_  
**jimmy** : Does everyone know what role they are?

_*they all know*_  
**jimmy** : Great! Well let’s start the first game then. Everyone close your eyes. Anyone who is mafia, open your eyes now. Recognise your teammates and decide on someone to kill.

**butters** : Oh, well I think we should kill-

**Everyone** : BUTTERS!!!! 

**jimmy** : All right, we’re going to have to reshuffle.

**cartman** : Goddammit Butters, how fucking stupid are you!! 

**butters** : But Jimmy said to decide on someone to kill!

**kyle** : Butters, you need to decide silently! Otherwise the townspeople are going to know who the mafia are by listening to their voices! Isn’t that obvious? 

**butters** : But how would you decide silently? 

**craig** : Point to someone, dumbass.

**butters** : OH! I’m mighty sorry fellas! 

**jimmy** : _*sighs*_ It’s okay Butters, it was an honest mistake. Let’s just reshuffle the roles and start again.  
_*they reshuffle the roles and the new roles are allocated*_

**jimmy** : Okay, does everyone know what role they are?  
_*they all know*_

**jimmy** : Does everyone know that they have to stay silent when deciding who to choose?

**butters** : Yeah…  
_*the rest all know*_

**jimmy** : Fantastic! So let’s start then, for real this time. Everyone close your eyes. Mafia, open your eyes now. Recognise your teammates and decide on someone to kill.  
_*the mafia choose someone*_

**jimmy** : Okay, now close your eyes again. Cop, open your eyes and decide on someone to check.  
_*the cop chooses someone*_

**jimmy** : Thumbs up means they’re a townsperson and thumbs down means they’re mafia.  
_*jimmy gestures to the cop. the cop nods*_

**jimmy** : Cool, so close your eyes again Cop. Medic, open your eyes and decide on someone to save.  
_*the medic decides on someone*_

**jimmy** : Okay then, Medic close your eyes again. Good job fellas. Everyone wake up now and let’s start the day phase.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Who was killed in the night?
> 
> Who can be trusted, and who is planning something heinous?
> 
> Will the town be able to pull this off?
> 
> Find out in the next chapter of The South Park Mafia! _*dun dun dun*_


	4. Rules of the game: solutions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a solutions chapter. Do not proceed any further if you don't want to be spoiled. Go back to the previous chapter.

**jimmy** : So who here already knows how to play?

 **kyle** : We’re all new to this Jimmy. No-one knows.

 **jimmy** : Okay so there are two teams: the evil mafia, and the good townspeople.

 **cartman** : Well we all know which team Kahl’s on then.

 **kyle** : Shut up fat boy, more like we all know which team you’re on!

 **jimmy** : The teams are randomly decided, guys.

 **cartman** : _*under his breath*_ It’s _**OBVIOUS**_ Kahl’s mafia, guys…

 **stan** : Okay so there are two teams that are randomly decided, what else?

 **jimmy** : Nine people are playing, so there will be two mafia and seven townspeople.

 **craig** : Wait, nine? But there’s ten of us here?

 **jimmy** : Yes, someone has to moderate the game to make sure no-one cheats.

 **cartman** : Ah yes, a moderator. Good idea Jimmy. _*glares at Kyle*_

 **kyle** : _*rolls his eyes*_

 **jimmy** : Since I’m the only one who knows how to play. I’ll moderate the first game. Now listen up fellas, because the next information is very important. The mafia will know who each other are, but the townspeople will not know who anyone are except for themselves.

 **tweek** : OH GOD! So the mafia could be anyone?! 

**jimmy** : Yes Tweek, if you are a townsperson, then until you find out who the mafia are, the mafia really could be anyone.

 **tweek** : GAHHHH!!! THIS IS TOO MUCH PRESSURE!

 **jimmy** : To help the odds of the townspeople, there also are some special town roles: the Cop and the Medic.

 **token** : So there are two types of townspeople is what you’re saying. The special ones and the normal ones?

 **jimmy** : Exactly, Token! Okay, so is everyone following so far? No-one is confused, right?  
_*no-one is confused yet*_  
Good, so now I can tell you how the game is played. The game is played in two phases: night and day. In the night phase, the mafia will choose someone to kill.

 **tweek** : KILL?!! JESUS CHRIST!!! 

**kenny** : are you for real?!

 **jimmy** : Not kill for real. Just kill as in that person is out of the game but can still watch. So, the mafia choose someone to kill in the night and in the day phase, the townspeople have to decide on someone who might be mafia and execute that person. The executed person is also out of the game but can still watch. The game is over when the number of townspeople left is the same as the number of mafia left, or if the townspeople correctly execute all the mafia.

 **clyde** : Okay, _**NOW**_ I’m confused.

 **jimmy** : Don’t worry Clyde, it’s my job as the moderator to guide you through the game so don’t worry if it seems like it’s too much to remember now.

 **butters** : Ah, what about those special town roles you were talking about before? 

**jimmy** : Ah yes! Thanks for reminding me, Butters! So to help the townspeople in their fight against the mafia, the special roles get to do certain things in the night phase. The Cop can check one person every night to see if they’re a townsperson or mafia. And the Medic can choose one person every night to save. So if the mafia chose someone to kill, but the Medic also chose to save that person, then they will not die. The Medic can choose to save themselves if they want but they can’t save the same person twice in a row. Also, the townspeople do not know who the people with the special roles are and neither do the mafia.

 **cartman** : Well all right then. Gentlemen, I implore you now, nominate me as your Cop. I know that it’s a position that holds a lot of responsibility, but rest assured that I will use my power to lead the good town to victory *cough cough* and eliminate all Jews *cough cough*

 **jimmy** : Sorry Eric, but no-one can nominate you as anything because the special roles are randomly decided too.

 **cartman** : Goddammit…

 **jimmy** : That’s all you need to know folks. Should we draw from a hat to decide who plays as what role?

 **stan** : Yeah, you can use my hat.

 **jimmy** : Do you have paper anywhere? 

**stan** : I’ll go get some.

 _*later, when all the roles have been put into stan’s hat and they’ve all drawn their roles*_  
**jimmy** : Alright fellas, look at your slip of paper and DO NOT show anyone else what role you are.

 _*they all look at their role*_  
**jimmy** : Does everyone know what role they are?

 _*they all know*_  
**jimmy** : Great! Well let’s start the first game then. Everyone close your eyes. Anyone who is mafia, open your eyes now. Recognise your teammates and decide on someone to kill.

~  
Solutions:  


**Who’s playing** :  
Stan, Kyle, Cartman, Kenny, Butters, Craig, Clyde, Token, Tweek

 **Narrator** :  
Jimmy

 **Mafia** :  
Butters, Token

 **Regular town** :  
Kyle, Clyde, Stan, Tweek, Kenny

 **Special town** :  
Cop: Cartman, Medic: Craig

~

 **butters** : Oh, well I think we should kill-

 **Everyone** : BUTTERS!!!! 

**jimmy** : All right, we’re going to have to reshuffle.

 **cartman** : Goddammit Butters, how fucking stupid are you!! 

**butters** : But Jimmy said to decide on someone to kill!

 **kyle** : Butters, you need to decide silently! Otherwise the townspeople are going to know who the mafia are by listening to their voices! Isn’t that obvious? 

**butters** : But how would you decide silently? 

**craig** : Point to someone, dumbass.

 **butters** : OH! I’m mighty sorry fellas! 

**jimmy** : _*sighs*_ It’s okay Butters, it was an honest mistake. Let’s just reshuffle the roles and start again.  
_*they reshuffle the roles and the new roles are allocated*_

~  
Solutions:  


**Who’s playing** :  
Stan, Kyle, Cartman, Kenny, Butters, Craig, Clyde, Token, Tweek

 **Narrator** :  
Jimmy

 **Mafia** :  
Tweek, Kenny

 **Regular town** :  
Cartman, Butters, Craig, Kyle, Clyde

 **Special town** :  
Cop: Token, Medic: Stan  
~

 **jimmy** : Okay, does everyone know what role they are?  
_*they all know*_

 **jimmy** : Does everyone know that they have to stay silent when deciding who to choose?

 **butters** : Yeah…  
_*the rest all know*_

 **jimmy** : Fantastic! So let’s start then, for real this time. Everyone close your eyes. Mafia, open your eyes now. Recognise your teammates and decide on someone to kill.  
_*the mafia choose someone*_

 **jimmy** : Okay, now close your eyes again. Cop, open your eyes and decide on someone to check.  
_*the cop chooses someone*_

 **jimmy** : Thumbs up means they’re a townsperson and thumbs down means they’re mafia.  
_*jimmy gestures to the cop. the cop nods*_

 **jimmy** : Cool, so close your eyes again Cop. Medic, open your eyes and decide on someone to save.  
_*the medic decides on someone*_

 **jimmy** : Okay then, Medic close your eyes again. Good job fellas. Everyone wake up now and let’s start the day phase.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Who was killed in the night?
> 
> Who can be trusted, and who is planning something heinous?
> 
> Will the town be able to pull this off?
> 
> Find out in the next chapter of The South Park Mafia! _*dun dun dun*_


	5. Round One: play-along

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a play-along chapter. If you want solutions, click ahead to the next chapter.
> 
> In the last chapter of The South Park Mafia! 
> 
> **jimmy** : …Mafia, open your eyes now. Recognise your teammates and decide on someone to kill.  
>  _*the mafia choose someone*_
> 
>  **jimmy** : Okay, now close your eyes again. Cop, open your eyes and decide on someone to check.  
>  _*the cop chooses someone*_
> 
>  **jimmy** : Thumbs up means they’re a townsperson and thumbs down means they’re mafia.  
>  _*jimmy gestures to the cop. the cop nods*_
> 
>  **jimmy** : Cool, so close your eyes again Cop. Medic, open your eyes and decide on someone to save.  
>  _*the medic decides on someone*_
> 
>  **jimmy** : Okay then, Medic close your eyes again. Good job fellas. Everyone wake up now and let’s start the day phase.
> 
> Who was killed in the night? Let’s find out now! _*dun dun dun*_

**jimmy** : And I’m sorry to say that the poor townsperson who was killed in the night was… Kyle. God rest his soul.

 **kyle** : Goddammit!

 **Cartman** : HA! _*singsong*_ NYEH-NYEH NYEH-NYEH NYEH-NYEH! Kahl died first! 

**jimmy** : Who could have committed such an atrocious act? Townspeople, discuss! 

**stan** : All right, so we all know who did this.

 **tweek** : We do?!

 **stan** : Yeah dude, I mean c’mon! There’s only one person who would think to kill Kyle first. Cartman’s probably mafia.

 **craig** : Yeah that would make sense.

 **cartman** : For your information, I am not mafia! In fact, that sounds like someone who’s trying to cover his tracks!

 **stan** : What are you talking about fatass?

 **cartman** : Think about it you guys. The person who’s least likely to kill Kahl is Stan, right? Because he's so homo for his little Jew boyfriend! But what if… what if Stan is mafia and he killed Kahl to make everyone _**THINK**_ it was me but it was _**ACTUALLY**_ him?!?!?!

 **butters** : _**YEAH!**_ What have you got to say for yourself Stan?

 **stan** : That’s retarded and you know it.

 **token** : As much as I hate to admit it Stan, Cartman does have a point. That WOULD be a pretty good way to get us off your tracks.

 **kyle** : Yeah but think about what Cartman would do in this situation! He’d try to get suspicion off himself by pinning it on someone else! 

**jimmy** : Kyle, can I please ask you to not contribute to the discussion during the day phase? The dead don’t talk, so you’re no exception.

 **kyle** : _*dissatisfied groan*_ Ahh, all right sorry.

 **cartman** : Yeah that’s right! Fuck you Jew! 

**tweek** : But you guys, Kyle’s right you know! In this game, you can’t trust anyone!

 **clyde** : So then what do we do?

 **token** : Let’s think this out guys. Kyle’s dead, so the people left are myself, Stan, Cartman, Craig, Tweek, Butters, and Clyde.

 **kenny** : I’m alive too, dude

 **token** : And Kenny. Now, who out of us would gain anything from killing Kyle?

 **stan** : Well Cartman wouldn’t GAIN anything really but he’d still want Kyle out of the game! Tell me you guys can see that! 

**cartman** : You know what I see guys? All I see is a fucking liar who’s probably jacking off to his dead boyfriend’s body right now! Guys, side with me and stop Stan from jacking off to Kahl’s dead body! 

**stan** : Fuck off fatass.

 **kyle** : Hey Jimmy, is there a time limit on this thing? Otherwise this could be a very long night…

 **jimmy** : Well, kinda. I’ll push you guys along if you’re taking too long.

 **butters** : Uh, hey fellas… can I say something?

 **cartman** : No Butters, you can’t say anything.

 **butters** : Oh okay :(

 **stan** : Go ahead and say what you wanted Butters. Cartman’s just being a douchebag.

 **butters** : Well uh, I was thinking that maybe we should take turns saying who we think the mafia are. That way, everyone gets a chance to speak.

 **stan** : Okay good idea. Let’s go around the circle. Cartman you’ve said enough already. Kenny, you’re next.

 **kenny** : Dude, I’m watching porn.

 **clyde** : What type? _*leans over to look*_

 **kenny** : MILF

 **clyde** : Nice.

 **kyle** : Kenny, you either play the game or watch porn. You can’t do both.

 **kenny** : Okay I’m done. What did you need me for? 

**clyde** : Who do you think the mafia are? 

**kenny** : The mafia? 

**Everyone** : GAHHH… _*they explain the situation to kenny and wait for his verdict*_

 **kenny** : Mmm… I think Stan’s more suspicious.

 **token** : Okay, but why though? 

**kenny** : Because he hasn’t defended himself properly. All he’s said is “that’s retarded” and “come on guys, can’t you see that Cartman would do this”… I don’t fucking trust Cartman, but at least he’s said something worth a shit.

 **stan** : How is any of what Cartman said- you know what, I’ll defend myself properly when it’s my turn to speak. Clyde, your turn.

 **clyde** : Uhm… I don’t know.

 **cartman** : Clyde goddammit you have to pick someone! 

**clyde** : I really don’t know, okay? How am I supposed to know if one of you is lying? Like, what if Cartman’s right and Stan really does have it in him to backstab Kyle? This is too hard!

 **stan** : Seriously? _*sighs*_ All right, Butters you’re next.

 **butters** : Oh well, I really don’t think Eric’s mafia and I don’t know about Stan but shouldn’t we be suspicious of quiet people too? 

**token** : How do you mean?

 **butters** : Because if the townspeople are arguing and causing chaos amongst themselves, well then the mafia wouldn’t need to say much… I mean, all they’d need to do is just watch the townspeople execute each other and not do anything to stop it!

 **token** : Yeah, that makes a lot of sense.

 **stan** : Good point Butters. All right, my turn. First of all, my defence. Cartman’s accusation makes no sense! He says that I would never kill Kyle as mafia but that’s not true! I’ve played against Kyle in video-games and boardgames and stuff and I always play to win! Otherwise it’s not fun! Anyone who’s played games with us before knows I’m telling the truth! 

**Everyone** : _*nods amongst themselves*_

 **craig** : Yeah that’s believable, but what you’re effectively saying is that you have it in you to backstab Kyle.

 **stan** : NO! Well, yeah I guess I do… but it doesn’t mean I did it this time!

 **Everyone** : _*exchanges glances*_

 **kyle** : Stan, you’d better be town or I swear to god…

 **stan** : Look, I don’t have anything to prove that I’m _**NOT**_ mafia yet, but all I’m saying is that you shouldn’t accuse me based on Cartman’s logic. The whole idea that I would do the opposite of what _**HE THINKS**_ I would do is stupid, don’t you think? Like, how is he so sure that I’d never backstab Kyle when I’ve always played to win before?

 **Everyone aside from Cartman** : _*reconsiders and is convinced by Stan’s defence*_

 **kenny** : I take back what I said about Stan before.

 **cartman** : _*under his breath*_ You guys are going to regret this...

 **stan** : Okay great. Now secondly, is there anyone who seriously believes that Cartman wouldn’t take the opportunity to kill Kyle as soon as he could? Anyone at all? 

**Everyone** : _*exchanges glances*_

 **token** : Look Stan, I think we all get what you’re saying and it sounds like something Cartman would do but it doesn’t mean he actually DID it.

 **butters** : It’s like you said before. You _**COULD**_ kill Kyle if you were mafia, but it doesn’t mean you did it this time.

 **craig** : If Cartman was mafia, I could also see him keeping Kyle in the game for as long as he could just to fuck with him.

 **stan** : That’s true… 

**tweek** : It’s Cartman, dude! He could be doing anything! What should we do? Do you guys think we should trust him? 

**token** : Let’s keep going around the circle and hearing everyone speak. Then maybe we can decide what to do. Craig, you’re up next. 

**craig** : I trust what Butters said about watching the quiet people. If people are quiet, it means that they’re either mafia and things are going right for them, or that they’re shit town because they’re not making an effort to be useful.

 **butters** : _**YEAH!**_ All the good townspeople should be saying something useful! 

**cartman** : So then… Tweek, Kenny, and Clyde, congratulations, you’re all shit town. What do you have to say for yourselves?

 **kenny** : I just haven’t gotten a read on anyone yet, man. I’m staying quiet so I can observe people.

 **clyde** : I’m still trying to figure out if I trust Cartman or Stan more!

 **tweek** : God, I know right?! I just don’t know who to believe! I’m hearing all these accusations and it’s like everyone’s telling the truth but everyone’s lying at the same time!

 **cartman** : Well you know, if there’s one person you can trust among all these lying backstabbers… if there’s one person you can look to for guidance in this misguided but good town, it’s yours truly.

 **stan** : Cartman, you can’t just tell people that and expect them to believe you!

 **clyde** : Hey I know! Why don’t we ask the Cop? There’s no way that anyone would be the Cop and not check Cartman first, right? 

**Everyone** : _*sighs exasperatedly*_

 **cartman** : Oh boy… this is what we're dealing with, men.

 **token** : Clyde… for us to ask the Cop, the Cop has to reveal himself. If he does that, the mafia will kill him next.

 **clyde** : Oh! Yeah, true. 

**cartman** : Well I guess now we know that Clyde isn’t the Cop, so it’s totally fine if he dies.

 **butters** : But what if he’s the Medic?

 **clyde** : Yeah! What if I’m the medic?

 **cartman** : then God help us all…

 **jimmy** : Okay fellas, we’ve passed six and a half minutes and we still don’t have anyone up for execution. Step on it, please.

 **stan** : Okay, so Craig, are you saying that you think the quiet people are mafia? 

**craig** : It’s a bit early to tell but if they don’t start saying more, then obviously we’ve got a problem.

 **stan** : All right. Tweek? Anything? 

**tweek** : Oh god, uhm… what happens if we execute wrong this round?! 

**stan** : Then we execute wrong? What else could happen?

 **tweek** : No, what I mean is that we can only make so many mistakes before the mafia win! 

**cartman** : He’s right. Think about it, we’re losing two people every round. Whoever the mafia kills is obviously town so if we execute wrong this round? Well, we’re just making it easier for the mafia to win. How many town can we execute before we can’t afford to fuck up anymore? 

**token** : You guys, we can work it out! So, nine of us are playing and we lose two people each round. Kyle’s already dead, so if we execute wrong this round we’ll have seven players left, right? 

**butters** : Two mafia and five town.

 **token** : Right, and if we execute a townsperson _**AGAIN**_ at the end of the next round, we’ll have two mafia and three town left.

 **butters** : And the mafia will kill a townsperson in the night, so then the numbers will be even.

 **clyde** : Wait, so that means-

 **kenny** : Oh shit!

 **cartman** : That’s right guys, we can only execute wrong once. Now we know to be careful with our one chance to not fuck up.

 **tweek** : OH MY GOD!!! 

**craig** : Why don’t we just choose to not execute someone then? Then we’ll cut the number of people dying in this round by half. Is that an option Jimmy?

 **jimmy** : The option is there if you need it fellas, just let me know if you’re choosing not to execute.

 **stan** : Could we vote on it now? Everyone who thinks we shouldn’t execute someone this round put your hands up.

 **Everyone except Cartman** : _*puts their hands up*_

 **kenny** : Dude, what the fuck? 

**stan** : Cartman, I swear to God you better have a good reason for not voting yes!

 **cartman** : I do, okay? just calm down and run with me on this. Remember how Clyde said that dumbass thing about asking the Cop and he pretty much outed himself as town? Well, why don’t we execute Clyde this round?

 **clyde** : Wait _**WHAT?**_

 **stan** : How did he “out himself” as town? All we got from that exchange is that he’s not the Cop!

 **cartman** : If he’s mafia, he’d be bluffing the fuck out of us right now. You seriously don’t think he’s smart enough to do that, right? 

**stan** : Good point.

 **clyde** : Hey!

 **butters** : That’s still crazy-talk though! Why would we kill someone who’s obviously town? 

**tweek** : Oh my god… wait guys! Sorry Clyde, but we should do this!

 **craig** : Tweek! You’re taking Cartman’s side so easily?

 **clyde** : Guys, hold on a second! 

**tweek** : Cartman, are you going where I think you’re going with this?!

 **cartman** : If you guys think about it, the mafia will want to kill as many town as possible so that only the people we don’t know much about are left. That way it’s easier to implicate them. Clyde is the most town looking person here at the moment so he’ll probably be the next night kill. If we kill him now, the mafia will be forced to kill some other townsperson. It’ll give us more information and we can narrow the number of suspects down! You understand, right Tweek?

 **tweek** : Yes!

 **stan** : This is all based on the logic that Clyde isn’t a special townsperson though. If he’s the medic, then we’re screwed!

 **cartman** : Clyde, you’d better not be the medic.

 **clyde** : I’m not.

 **cartman** : So it’s fine to kill him then.

 **craig** : We only get one chance to fuck up though! Even if we narrow down the suspects, we could still end up executing the wrong person and fuck ourselves over.

 **cartman** : It’s a risk we have to be willing to take to win.

 **kenny** : This could just be two mafia trying to talk us into killing an obvious townsperson though!

 **stan** : Yeah! It’d be so much easier if we had someone who could confidently vouch for their innocence.

 **token** : Cartman’s clean.

 **Everyone** : _*looks at Token*_

 **token** : I’m the Cop. I checked Cartman and he’s town. I know his plan is risky, but I think he’s honestly doing it to help.

 **clyde** : Oh my god Token! But now the mafia will go for you!

 **token** : They don’t know who the Medic is yet. As long as the Medic is still alive, there’s a chance I can make it into the next round. I just hope Kyle wasn’t the medic.

 **cartman** : Okay if the Medic is still alive, he needs to pick between either Token or me to save because one of us will be the next night kill.

 **kyle** : That’s not really a hard choice at all, now is it?

 **cartman** : Couldn’t agree more Kahl. If you have your priorities right Medic, you should save me first.

 **kyle** : Cartman, I swear to god…

 **token** : Everyone, remember that the confirmed town are myself, Cartman, Clyde, and Kyle. The people who we don’t know about yet are Stan, Craig, Butters, Kenny, and Tweek. Jimmy, we’re voting to execute Clyde.

 **jimmy** : Sure fellas, just remember though that once someone has been executed, no more discussion is allowed. Make sure that the man up for execution is the one you really want dead. So, all in favour of executing Clyde?

 **Everyone** : _*raises their hands. it’s a unanimous vote*_

 **jimmy** : Okay then! Clyde, you’re joining the ranks of the dead. God rest your soul.

 **clyde** : You guys better get the mafia! I didn’t sacrifice myself for you shitheads to lose!

 **stan** : Don’t worry Clyde! We’ll make sure we win for you!

 **kyle** : Argh! Finally I can talk to someone! Clyde, come sit here.

 **jimmy** : All right everyone, that’s a wrap for round one! Everyone close your eyes and get ready for the next round! Mafia, open your eyes and decide on someone to kill.  
_*the mafia choose someone*_

 **jimmy** : Okay, now close your eyes again. Cop, open your eyes and decide on someone to check.  
_*the cop chooses someone*_

 **jimmy** : Once again, thumbs up for townsperson and thumbs down for mafia.  
_*jimmy gestures to the cop. the cop nods*_

 **jimmy** : Got it, close your eyes again. Medic, open your eyes and decide on someone to save.  
_*the medic decides on someone*_

 **jimmy** : Okay, and close your eyes. Everyone open your eyes and let’s start the next round!


	6. Round One: solutions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a solutions chapter. If you don't want solutions, go back to the previous chapter.
> 
> In the last chapter of The South Park Mafia!
> 
> **jimmy** : …Mafia, open your eyes now. Recognise your teammates and decide on someone to kill.  
>  _*the mafia choose someone*_
> 
> **jimmy** : Okay, now close your eyes again. Cop, open your eyes and decide on someone to check.  
>  _*the cop chooses someone*_
> 
> **jimmy** : Thumbs up means they’re a townsperson and thumbs down means they’re mafia.  
>  _*jimmy gestures to the cop. the cop nods*_
> 
> **jimmy** : Cool, so close your eyes again Cop. Medic, open your eyes and decide on someone to save.  
>  _*the medic decides on someone*_
> 
> **jimmy** : Okay then, Medic close your eyes again. Good job fellas. Everyone wake up now and let’s start the day phase.
> 
> Who was killed in the night? Let’s find out now! _*dun dun dun*_

**jimmy** : And I’m sorry to say that the poor townsperson who was killed in the night was… Kyle. God rest his soul.

**kyle** : Goddammit!

**Cartman** : HA! _*singsong*_ NYEH-NYEH NYEH-NYEH NYEH-NYEH! Kahl died first! 

**jimmy** : Who could have committed such an atrocious act? Townspeople, discuss! 

~

Solutions:

**Who’s playing** :  
Stan, Cartman, Kenny, Butters, Craig, Clyde, Token, Tweek

**Dead** :  
Kyle (regular town)

**Narrator** :  
Jimmy

**Mafia** :  
Tweek, Kenny

**Regular town** :  
Cartman, Butters, Craig, Clyde

**Special town** :  
Cop: Token, Medic: Stan

~

**stan** : All right, so we all know who did this.

**tweek** : We do?!

**stan** : Yeah dude, I mean c’mon! There’s only one person who would think to kill Kyle first. Cartman’s probably mafia.

**craig** : Yeah that would make sense.

**cartman** : For your information, I am not mafia! In fact, that sounds like someone who’s trying to cover his tracks!

**stan** : What are you talking about fatass?

**cartman** : Think about it you guys. The person who’s least likely to kill Kahl is Stan, right? Because he's so homo for his little Jew boyfriend! But what if… what if Stan is mafia and he killed Kahl to make everyone _**THINK**_ it was me but it was _**ACTUALLY**_ him?!?!?!

**butters** : _**YEAH!**_ What have you got to say for yourself Stan?

**stan** : That’s retarded and you know it.

**token** : As much as I hate to admit it Stan, Cartman does have a point. That WOULD be a pretty good way to get us off your tracks.

**kyle** : Yeah but think about what Cartman would do in this situation! He’d try to get suspicion off himself by pinning it on someone else! 

**jimmy** : Kyle, can I please ask you to not contribute to the discussion during the day phase? The dead don’t talk, so you’re no exception.

**kyle** : _*dissatisfied groan*_ Ahh, all right sorry.

**cartman** : Yeah that’s right! Fuck you Jew! 

**tweek** : But you guys, Kyle’s right you know! In this game, you can’t trust anyone!

**clyde** : So then what do we do?

**token** : Let’s think this out guys. Kyle’s dead, so the people left are myself, Stan, Cartman, Craig, Tweek, Butters, and Clyde.

**kenny** : I’m alive too, dude

**token** : And Kenny. Now, who out of us would gain anything from killing Kyle?

**stan** : Well Cartman wouldn’t GAIN anything really but he’d still want Kyle out of the game! Tell me you guys can see that! 

**cartman** : You know what I see guys? All I see is a fucking liar who’s probably jacking off to his dead boyfriend’s body right now! Guys, side with me and stop Stan from jacking off to Kahl’s dead body! 

**stan** : Fuck off fatass.

**kyle** : Hey Jimmy, is there a time limit on this thing? Otherwise this could be a very long night…

**jimmy** : Well, kinda. I’ll push you guys along if you’re taking too long.

**butters** : Uh, hey fellas… can I say something?

**cartman** : No Butters, you can’t say anything.

**butters** : Oh okay :(

**stan** : Go ahead and say what you wanted Butters. Cartman’s just being a douchebag.

**butters** : Well uh, I was thinking that maybe we should take turns saying who we think the mafia are. That way, everyone gets a chance to speak.

**stan** : Okay good idea. Let’s go around the circle. Cartman you’ve said enough already. Kenny, you’re next.

**kenny** : Dude, I’m watching porn.

**clyde** : What type? _*leans over to look*_

**kenny** : MILF

**clyde** : Nice.

**kyle** : Kenny, you either play the game or watch porn. You can’t do both.

**kenny** : Okay I’m done. What did you need me for? 

**clyde** : Who do you think the mafia are? 

**kenny** : The mafia? 

**Everyone** : GAHHH… _*they explain the situation to kenny and wait for his verdict*_

**kenny** : Mmm… I think Stan’s more suspicious.

**token** : Okay, but why though? 

**kenny** : Because he hasn’t defended himself properly. All he’s said is “that’s retarded” and “come on guys, can’t you see that Cartman would do this”… I don’t fucking trust Cartman, but at least he’s said something worth a shit.

**stan** : How is any of what Cartman said- you know what, I’ll defend myself properly when it’s my turn to speak. Clyde, your turn.

**clyde** : Uhm… I don’t know.

**cartman** : Clyde goddammit you have to pick someone! 

**clyde** : I really don’t know, okay? How am I supposed to know if one of you is lying? Like, what if Cartman’s right and Stan really does have it in him to backstab Kyle? This is too hard!

**stan** : Seriously? _*sighs*_ All right, Butters you’re next.

**butters** : Oh well, I really don’t think Eric’s mafia and I don’t know about Stan but shouldn’t we be suspicious of quiet people too? 

**token** : How do you mean?

**butters** : Because if the townspeople are arguing and causing chaos amongst themselves, well then the mafia wouldn’t need to say much… I mean, all they’d need to do is just watch the townspeople execute each other and not do anything to stop it!

**token** : Yeah, that makes a lot of sense.

**stan** : Good point Butters. All right, my turn. First of all, my defence. Cartman’s accusation makes no sense! He says that I would never kill Kyle as mafia but that’s not true! I’ve played against Kyle in video-games and boardgames and stuff and I always play to win! Otherwise it’s not fun! Anyone who’s played games with us before knows I’m telling the truth! 

**Everyone** : _*nods amongst themselves*_

**craig** : Yeah that’s believable, but what you’re effectively saying is that you have it in you to backstab Kyle.

**stan** : NO! Well, yeah I guess I do… but it doesn’t mean I did it this time!

**Everyone** : _*exchanges glances*_

**kyle** : Stan, you’d better be town or I swear to god…

**stan** : Look, I don’t have anything to prove that I’m _**NOT**_ mafia yet, but all I’m saying is that you shouldn’t accuse me based on Cartman’s logic. The whole idea that I would do the opposite of what _**HE THINKS**_ I would do is stupid, don’t you think? Like, how is he so sure that I’d never backstab Kyle when I’ve always played to win before?

**Everyone aside from Cartman** : _*reconsiders and is convinced by Stan’s defence*_

**kenny** : I take back what I said about Stan before.

**cartman** : _*under his breath*_ You guys are going to regret this...

**stan** : Okay great. Now secondly, is there anyone who seriously believes that Cartman wouldn’t take the opportunity to kill Kyle as soon as he could? Anyone at all? 

**Everyone** : _*exchanges glances*_

**token** : Look Stan, I think we all get what you’re saying and it sounds like something Cartman would do but it doesn’t mean he actually DID it.

**butters** : It’s like you said before. You _**COULD**_ kill Kyle if you were mafia, but it doesn’t mean you did it this time.

**craig** : If Cartman was mafia, I could also see him keeping Kyle in the game for as long as he could just to fuck with him.

**stan** : That’s true… 

**tweek** : It’s Cartman, dude! He could be doing anything! What should we do? Do you guys think we should trust him? 

**token** : Let’s keep going around the circle and hearing everyone speak. Then maybe we can decide what to do. Craig, you’re up next. 

**craig** : I trust what Butters said about watching the quiet people. If people are quiet, it means that they’re either mafia and things are going right for them, or that they’re shit town because they’re not making an effort to be useful.

**butters** : _**YEAH!**_ All the good townspeople should be saying something useful! 

**cartman** : So then… Tweek, Kenny, and Clyde, congratulations, you’re all shit town. What do you have to say for yourselves?

**kenny** : I just haven’t gotten a read on anyone yet, man. I’m staying quiet so I can observe people.

**clyde** : I’m still trying to figure out if I trust Cartman or Stan more!

**tweek** : God, I know right?! I just don’t know who to believe! I’m hearing all these accusations and it’s like everyone’s telling the truth but everyone’s lying at the same time!

**cartman** : Well you know, if there’s one person you can trust among all these lying backstabbers… if there’s one person you can look to for guidance in this misguided but good town, it’s yours truly.

**stan** : Cartman, you can’t just tell people that and expect them to believe you!

**clyde** : Hey I know! Why don’t we ask the Cop? There’s no way that anyone would be the Cop and not check Cartman first, right? 

**Everyone** : _*sighs exasperatedly*_

**cartman** : Oh boy… this is what we're dealing with, men.

**token** : Clyde… for us to ask the Cop, the Cop has to reveal himself. If he does that, the mafia will kill him next.

**clyde** : Oh! Yeah, true. 

**cartman** : Well I guess now we know that Clyde isn’t the Cop, so it’s totally fine if he dies.

**butters** : But what if he’s the Medic?

**clyde** : Yeah! What if I’m the medic?

**cartman** : then God help us all…

**jimmy** : Okay fellas, we’ve passed six and a half minutes and we still don’t have anyone up for execution. Step on it, please.

**stan** : Okay, so Craig, are you saying that you think the quiet people are mafia? 

**craig** : It’s a bit early to tell but if they don’t start saying more, then obviously we’ve got a problem.

**stan** : All right. Tweek? Anything? 

**tweek** : Oh god, uhm… what happens if we execute wrong this round?! 

**stan** : Then we execute wrong? What else could happen?

**tweek** : No, what I mean is that we can only make so many mistakes before the mafia win! 

**cartman** : He’s right. Think about it, we’re losing two people every round. Whoever the mafia kills is obviously town so if we execute wrong this round? Well, we’re just making it easier for the mafia to win. How many town can we execute before we can’t afford to fuck up anymore? 

**token** : You guys, we can work it out! So, nine of us are playing and we lose two people each round. Kyle’s already dead, so if we execute wrong this round we’ll have seven players left, right? 

**butters** : Two mafia and five town.

**token** : Right, and if we execute a townsperson _**AGAIN**_ at the end of the next round, we’ll have two mafia and three town left.

**butters** : And the mafia will kill a townsperson in the night, so then the numbers will be even.

**clyde** : Wait, so that means-

**kenny** : Oh shit!

**cartman** : That’s right guys, we can only execute wrong once. Now we know to be careful with our one chance to not fuck up.

**tweek** : OH MY GOD!!! 

**craig** : Why don’t we just choose to not execute someone then? Then we’ll cut the number of people dying in this round by half. Is that an option Jimmy?

**jimmy** : The option is there if you need it fellas, just let me know if you’re choosing not to execute.

**stan** : Could we vote on it now? Everyone who thinks we shouldn’t execute someone this round put your hands up.

**Everyone except Cartman** : _*puts their hands up*_

**kenny** : Dude, what the fuck? 

**stan** : Cartman, I swear to God you better have a good reason for not voting yes!

**cartman** : I do, okay? just calm down and run with me on this. Remember how Clyde said that dumbass thing about asking the Cop and he pretty much outed himself as town? Well, why don’t we execute Clyde this round?

**clyde** : Wait _**WHAT?**_

**stan** : How did he “out himself” as town? All we got from that exchange is that he’s not the Cop!

**cartman** : If he’s mafia, he’d be bluffing the fuck out of us right now. You seriously don’t think he’s smart enough to do that, right? 

**stan** : Good point.

**clyde** : Hey!

**butters** : That’s still crazy-talk though! Why would we kill someone who’s obviously town? 

**tweek** : Oh my god… wait guys! Sorry Clyde, but we should do this!

**craig** : Tweek! You’re taking Cartman’s side so easily?

**clyde** : Guys, hold on a second! 

**tweek** : Cartman, are you going where I think you’re going with this?!

**cartman** : If you guys think about it, the mafia will want to kill as many town as possible so that only the people we don’t know much about are left. That way it’s easier to implicate them. Clyde is the most town looking person here at the moment so he’ll probably be the next night kill. If we kill him now, the mafia will be forced to kill some other townsperson. It’ll give us more information and we can narrow the number of suspects down! You understand, right Tweek?

**tweek** : Yes!

**stan** : This is all based on the logic that Clyde isn’t a special townsperson though. If he’s the medic, then we’re screwed!

**cartman** : Clyde, you’d better not be the medic.

**clyde** : I’m not.

**cartman** : So it’s fine to kill him then.

**craig** : We only get one chance to fuck up though! Even if we narrow down the suspects, we could still end up executing the wrong person and fuck ourselves over.

**cartman** : It’s a risk we have to be willing to take to win.

**kenny** : This could just be two mafia trying to talk us into killing an obvious townsperson though!

**stan** : Yeah! It’d be so much easier if we had someone who could confidently vouch for their innocence.

**token** : Cartman’s clean.

**Everyone** : _*looks at Token*_

**token** : I’m the Cop. I checked Cartman and he’s town. I know his plan is risky, but I think he’s honestly doing it to help.

**clyde** : Oh my god Token! But now the mafia will go for you!

**token** : They don’t know who the Medic is yet. As long as the Medic is still alive, there’s a chance I can make it into the next round. I just hope Kyle wasn’t the medic.

**cartman** : Okay if the Medic is still alive, he needs to pick between either Token or me to save because one of us will be the next night kill.

**kyle** : That’s not really a hard choice at all, now is it?

**cartman** : Couldn’t agree more Kahl. If you have your priorities right Medic, you should save me first.

**kyle** : Cartman, I swear to god…

**token** : Everyone, remember that the confirmed town are myself, Cartman, Clyde, and Kyle. The people who we don’t know about yet are Stan, Craig, Butters, Kenny, and Tweek. Jimmy, we’re voting to execute Clyde.

**jimmy** : Sure fellas, just remember though that once someone has been executed, no more discussion is allowed. Make sure that the man up for execution is the one you really want dead. So, all in favour of executing Clyde?

**Everyone** : _*raises their hands. it’s a unanimous vote*_

**jimmy** : Okay then! Clyde, you’re joining the ranks of the dead. God rest your soul.

~

Solutions:

**Who’s playing** :  
Stan, Cartman, Kenny, Butters, Craig, Token, Tweek

**Dead** :  
Kyle (regular town), Clyde (regular town)

**Narrator** :  
Jimmy

**Mafia** :  
Tweek, Kenny

**Regular town** :  
Cartman, Butters, Craig

**Special town** :  
Cop: Token, Medic: Stan

~

**clyde** : You guys better get the mafia! I didn’t sacrifice myself for you shitheads to lose!

**stan** : Don’t worry Clyde! We’ll make sure we win for you!

**kyle** : Argh! Finally I can talk to someone! Clyde, come sit here.

**jimmy** : All right everyone, that’s a wrap for round one! Everyone close your eyes and get ready for the next round! Mafia, open your eyes and decide on someone to kill.  
_*the mafia choose someone*_

**jimmy** : Okay, now close your eyes again. Cop, open your eyes and decide on someone to check.  
_*the cop chooses someone*_

**jimmy** : Once again, thumbs up for townsperson and thumbs down for mafia.  
_*jimmy gestures to the cop. the cop nods*_

**jimmy** : Got it, close your eyes again. Medic, open your eyes and decide on someone to save.  
_*the medic decides on someone*_

**jimmy** : Okay, and close your eyes. Everyone open your eyes and let’s start the next round!


	7. Round Two: play-along

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a play-along chapter. If you want solutions, click ahead to the next chapter. 
> 
> In the last chapter of the South Park Mafia:
> 
>  **token** : Jimmy, we’re voting to execute Clyde.
> 
>  **jimmy** : Sure fellas, just remember though that once someone has been executed, no more discussion is allowed. Make sure that the man up for execution is the one you really want dead. So, all in favour of executing Clyde?
> 
>  **Everyone** : _*raises their hands. it’s a unanimous vote*_
> 
>  **jimmy** : Okay then! Clyde, you’re joining the ranks of the dead. God rest your soul.
> 
>  **clyde** : You guys better get the mafia! I didn’t sacrifice myself for you shitheads to lose!
> 
>  **stan** : Don’t worry Clyde! We’ll make sure we win for you!
> 
> Will Clyde’s sacrifice be in vain? Only time will tell! _*dun dun dun*_
> 
> ~

**jimmy** : Unfortunately, we have another brutal death in South Park. This time, it’s… Eric. God rest his soul.

 **cartman** : Huh… well gentlemen, it’s been fun. The rest of you townspeople had better get the fucking mafia or I swear…

 **jimmy** : Those mafia are still on the loose! Townspeople, go about your discussing!

 **stan** : Token, who did you check?

 **token** : I checked-

 **tweek** : WAIT! DON’T TELL US YET! 

**token** : Why not?

 **tweek** : ACK! Because remember what Jimmy said? Once an execution happens, we can’t discuss anything further!! That’s lost information that could have been useful! 

**craig** : Yeah, good point. We probably won’t have any more cop checks after this round because Token’s likely going to be the next night kill.

 **stan** : Shit. Okay, well let’s talk about that then and once we’ve agreed on something then Token can tell us who he checked. That sound good to everybody? 

**Everyone except Butters** : _*nods and agrees*_

 **butters** : No, it doesn’t sound good to me.

 **cartman** : Butters, why are you such a douchebag?

 **kyle** : Shut up fatass, you’re dead remember?

 **cartman** : Myeehhhh...

 **craig** : Why not?

 **butters** : We only had one chance to mess up, remember? Now that one chance is gone. I know you fellas might think different, but I’d rather have as much information as possible before deciding on a plan.

 **stan** : We’re not making a plan to decide who to execute, Butters. It’s what we should do after Token’s gone!

 **butters** : Yeah, so can’t we find out who Token checked and then just hold off on executing anyone until we figure out a plan? 

**token** : Jimmy? Is that allowed? 

**jimmy** : The only rule is that there’s no more discussing once an execution has happened.

 **craig** : So we could do what butters said then. Token, you’re the Cop. Do you think your check will influence the plan for what we do next?

 **token** : Well I found mafia, so it’s a pretty significant check.

 **Everyone** : _*le gasp*_

 **tweek** : AHGGHH! We should hear it then! 

**stan** : Everybody listen, we need to hold off on executing until we’ve talked about what to do in the next round! Okay?

 **Everyone** : _*voices their agreement*_

 **stan** : Okay. So Token, who did you check? 

**token** : I checked Kenny.  
*dun dun dun*

 **stan** : Okay so we’re killing Kenny-

 **kyle** : _*from the world of the dead*_ You bastards!

 **stan** : -once we decide what to do for the next round.

 **kenny** : Don’t I get a chance to defend myself? 

**cartman** : Kinny, don’t you know that lawyers cost money? Ask Clyde’s mom, she’d know all about it.

 **kenny & clyde**: Hey shut the fuck up!

 **butters** : Aww fellas, I think we SHOULD give him a chance. It’s only fair.

 **stan** : Fine. Kenny, how do you plea?

 **kenny** : Not guilty! 

**Everyone** : _*mm yeah, he’s guilty*_

 **kenny** : Whatever. I’m going back to my MILF videos.

 **stan** : Token I’m just wondering though, of all the people here why did you choose Kenny? 

**token** : I thought it made sense from a defensive standpoint. He’s barely said anything all game and so there would be no evidence to defend him with in case he was a townsperson up for execution later.

 **jimmy** : Well fellas, I guess the moral of the story is to speak up unless you want to go down without a fight.

 **tweek** : So how should we decide what to do in the next round?! Like, do we go around the circle like last time? 

**token** : There’s one thing that I think is important, and it’s about the Medic. Nobody except him knows if he’s still alive so if he is, he should reveal himself if I die. We need as many confirmed townspeople as we can get. It’s safe for him to reveal himself because we either execute the last mafia next round, or we execute another wrong and the numbers will be even.

 **Everyone** : _*murmurs and nods among themselves*_

 **stan** : Okay, so the plan is that if Token dies the next round, the Medic needs to reveal themselves if they’re still alive and then we can work it out from there. Does everyone agree with this? 

**butters** : But what if the Medic’s already dead though? Then we’re fucked.

 **stan** : Well, I guess we wouldn’t be completely fucked. It’d probably just be going back around the circle and comparing reads on everyone.

 **craig** : Do you really think we have enough information on everyone left here to compare reads? 

**stan** : Well do you have a better idea, Craig? It’d be a really town move for you to suggest something to help us out.

 **craig** : Okay how’s this for suggesting something helpful? You seem to be telling everybody what we should be doing but who says you’re even trustworthy in the first place? For all we know, maybe Cartman was right about you being mafia and trying to misdirect everyone.

 **jimmy** : Ooo there’s tension a-building! 

**stan** : Are you being serious right now?! Okay so let’s say I AM mafia, we still can’t do anything in the last round except compare reads! 

**craig** : Can’t we? What if someone besides you comes out as the Medic? 

**stan** : Yeah? What IF someone besides me comes out as medic? What’s your point?

 **craig** : Then that makes you either a regular townsperson who’s being really controlling, or a mafia trying to look useful to the townspeople.

 **butters** : But we both agreed before that quiet people would be more suspicious? Don’t you think Stan’s been contributing? 

**craig** : No? He hasn’t done anything other than try to take a leader role and tell everyone what to do. At least Cartman shared his theories on the game.

 **butters** : Well yeah, I guess…

 **craig** : Look, everybody here except Stan has contributed something worthwhile. Butters, you said that thing before about being suspicious of quiet people and that’s why we’re having this discussion. Token’s the Cop, and we found out that Kenny’s mafia because of his check. Tweek, it was because of what you said that we found out we only had one chance to fuck up.

 **tweek** : Huh… I guess so.

 **craig** : What about Stan? What has he contributed except saying, “okay guys, this is the plan” or “do you guys have anything to say?”

 **stan** : How could I be mafia though? This whole time I’ve been trying to direct people because it pushes the game forward!

 **tweek** : But it’s like you said to Cartman before, you can’t just say that and expect everyone to believe you! 

**cartman** : I told you all you’d regret not trusting me! 

**token** : This is stuff for the next round guys. Look, we know that Kenny is definitely mafia so why don’t we just execute him now and leave all this for later on?

 **stan** : I don’t have a problem with that. Guys?

 **butters** : Sounds like a good plan to me.

 **tweek** : Uhh… okay sure.

 **craig** : Whatever.

 **token** : Jimmy, we’re voting to execute Kenny.

 **jimmy** : All righty then. All in favour of executing Kenny? 

**Everyone** : _*raises their hands. it’s unanimous*_

 **jimmy** : Rest in paradise Kenny, you’re passing into the ranks of the dead.

 **kenny** : _*under his breath*_ More like the ranks of the dicks… it’s not paradise without titties.

 **jimmy** : We’re dwindling in numbers folks! Everyone close your eyes and hold tight for the deciding round! Mafia, open your eyes and decide on someone to kill.  
_*the mafia choose someone*_

 **jimmy** : All right, close your eyes again. Cop, open your eyes and decide on a check.  
_*the cop chooses someone*_

 **jimmy** : You know this by now, thumbs up for townsperson and thumbs down for mafia.  
_*jimmy gestures to the cop. the cop nods*_

 **jimmy** : Good, close your eyes again. Last but never least, open your eyes Medic and decide on someone to save.  
_*the medic decides on someone*_

 **jimmy** : Close your eyes again. Excellent job fellas! Open your eyes and let’s find out who wins this bitch!


	8. Round Two: solutions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a solutions chapter. If you don't want to be spoiled, stop right now and click back to the previous chapter. 
> 
> In the last chapter of the South Park Mafia:
> 
>  **token** : Jimmy, we’re voting to execute Clyde.
> 
>  **jimmy** : Sure fellas, just remember though that once someone has been executed, no more discussion is allowed. Make sure that the man up for execution is the one you really want dead. So, all in favour of executing Clyde?
> 
>  **Everyone** : _*raises their hands. it’s a unanimous vote*_
> 
>  **jimmy** : Okay then! Clyde, you’re joining the ranks of the dead. God rest your soul.
> 
>  **clyde** : You guys better get the mafia! I didn’t sacrifice myself for you shitheads to lose!
> 
>  **stan** : Don’t worry Clyde! We’ll make sure we win for you!
> 
> Will Clyde’s sacrifice be in vain? Only time will tell! _*dun dun dun*_
> 
> ~

**jimmy** : Unfortunately, we have another brutal death in South Park. This time, it’s… Eric. God rest his soul.

 **cartman** : Huh… well gentlemen, it’s been fun. The rest of you townspeople had better get the fucking mafia or I swear…

 **jimmy** : Those mafia are still on the loose! Townspeople, go about your discussing!

~

Solutions:

 **Who’s playing** :  
Stan, Kenny, Butters, Craig, Token, Tweek

 **Dead** :  
Kyle, Cartman, Clyde

 **Narrator** :  
Jimmy

 **Mafia** :  
Tweek, Kenny

 **Regular town** :  
Butters, Craig

 **Special town** :  
Cop: Token, Medic: Stan

~

 **stan** : Token, who did you check?

 **token** : I checked-

 **tweek** : WAIT! DON’T TELL US YET! 

**token** : Why not?

 **tweek** : ACK! Because remember what Jimmy said? Once an execution happens, we can’t discuss anything further!! That’s lost information that could have been useful! 

**craig** : Yeah, good point. We probably won’t have any more cop checks after this round because Token’s likely going to be the next night kill.

 **stan** : Shit. Okay, well let’s talk about that then and once we’ve agreed on something then Token can tell us who he checked. That sound good to everybody? 

**Everyone except Butters** : _*nods and agrees*_

 **butters** : No, it doesn’t sound good to me.

 **cartman** : Butters, why are you such a douchebag?

 **kyle** : Shut up fatass, you’re dead remember?

 **cartman** : Myeehhhh...

 **craig** : Why not?

 **butters** : We only had one chance to mess up, remember? Now that one chance is gone. I know you fellas might think different, but I’d rather have as much information as possible before deciding on a plan.

 **stan** : We’re not making a plan to decide who to execute, Butters. It’s what we should do after Token’s gone!

 **butters** : Yeah, so can’t we find out who Token checked and then just hold off on executing anyone until we figure out a plan? 

**token** : Jimmy? Is that allowed? 

**jimmy** : The only rule is that there’s no more discussing once an execution has happened.

 **craig** : So we could do what butters said then. Token, you’re the Cop. Do you think your check will influence the plan for what we do next?

 **token** : Well I found mafia, so it’s a pretty significant check.

 **Everyone** : _*le gasp*_

 **tweek** : AHGGHH! We should hear it then! 

**stan** : Everybody listen, we need to hold off on executing until we’ve talked about what to do in the next round! Okay?

 **Everyone** : _*voices their agreement*_

 **stan** : Okay. So Token, who did you check? 

**token** : I checked Kenny.  
*dun dun dun*

 **stan** : Okay so we’re killing Kenny-

 **kyle** : _*from the world of the dead*_ You bastards!

 **stan** : -once we decide what to do for the next round.

 **kenny** : Don’t I get a chance to defend myself? 

**cartman** : Kinny, don’t you know that lawyers cost money? Ask Clyde’s mom, she’d know all about it.

 **kenny & clyde**: Hey shut the fuck up!

 **butters** : Aww fellas, I think we SHOULD give him a chance. It’s only fair.

 **stan** : Fine. Kenny, how do you plea?

 **kenny** : Not guilty! 

**Everyone** : _*mm yeah, he’s guilty*_

 **kenny** : Whatever. I’m going back to my MILF videos.

 **stan** : Token I’m just wondering though, of all the people here why did you choose Kenny? 

**token** : I thought it made sense from a defensive standpoint. He’s barely said anything all game and so there would be no evidence to defend him with in case he was a townsperson up for execution later.

 **jimmy** : Well fellas, I guess the moral of the story is to speak up unless you want to go down without a fight.

 **tweek** : So how should we decide what to do in the next round?! Like, do we go around the circle like last time? 

**token** : There’s one thing that I think is important, and it’s about the Medic. Nobody except him knows if he’s still alive so if he is, he should reveal himself if I die. We need as many confirmed townspeople as we can get. It’s safe for him to reveal himself because we either execute the last mafia next round, or we execute another wrong and the numbers will be even.

 **Everyone** : _*murmurs and nods among themselves*_

 **stan** : Okay, so the plan is that if Token dies the next round, the Medic needs to reveal themselves if they’re still alive and then we can work it out from there. Does everyone agree with this? 

**butters** : But what if the Medic’s already dead though? Then we’re fucked.

 **stan** : Well, I guess we wouldn’t be completely fucked. It’d probably just be going back around the circle and comparing reads on everyone.

 **craig** : Do you really think we have enough information on everyone left here to compare reads? 

**stan** : Well do you have a better idea, Craig? It’d be a really town move for you to suggest something to help us out.

 **craig** : Okay how’s this for suggesting something helpful? You seem to be telling everybody what we should be doing but who says you’re even trustworthy in the first place? For all we know, maybe Cartman was right about you being mafia and trying to misdirect everyone.

 **jimmy** : Ooo there’s tension a-building! 

**stan** : Are you being serious right now?! Okay so let’s say I AM mafia, we still can’t do anything in the last round except compare reads! 

**craig** : Can’t we? What if someone besides you comes out as the Medic? 

**stan** : Yeah? What IF someone besides me comes out as medic? What’s your point?

 **craig** : Then that makes you either a regular townsperson who’s being really controlling, or a mafia trying to look useful to the townspeople.

 **butters** : But we both agreed before that quiet people would be more suspicious? Don’t you think Stan’s been contributing? 

**craig** : No? He hasn’t done anything other than try to take a leader role and tell everyone what to do. At least Cartman shared his theories on the game.

 **butters** : Well yeah, I guess…

 **craig** : Look, everybody here except Stan has contributed something worthwhile. Butters, you said that thing before about being suspicious of quiet people and that’s why we’re having this discussion. Token’s the Cop, and we found out that Kenny’s mafia because of his check. Tweek, it was because of what you said that we found out we only had one chance to fuck up.

 **tweek** : Huh… I guess so.

 **craig** : What about Stan? What has he contributed except saying, “okay guys, this is the plan” or “do you guys have anything to say?”

 **stan** : How could I be mafia though? This whole time I’ve been trying to direct people because it pushes the game forward!

 **tweek** : But it’s like you said to Cartman before, you can’t just say that and expect everyone to believe you! 

**cartman** : I told you all you’d regret not trusting me! 

**token** : This is stuff for the next round guys. Look, we know that Kenny is definitely mafia so why don’t we just execute him now and leave all this for later on?

 **stan** : I don’t have a problem with that. Guys?

 **butters** : Sounds like a good plan to me.

 **tweek** : Uhh… okay sure.

 **craig** : Whatever.

 **token** : Jimmy, we’re voting to execute Kenny.

 **jimmy** : All righty then. All in favour of executing Kenny? 

**Everyone** : _*raises their hands. it’s unanimous*_

 **jimmy** : Rest in paradise Kenny, you’re passing into the ranks of the dead.

~

Solutions:

 **Who’s playing** :  
Stan, Butters, Craig, Token, Tweek

 **Dead** :  
Kyle, Cartman, Kenny, Clyde

 **Narrator** :  
Jimmy

 **Mafia** :  
Tweek

 **Regular town** :  
Butters, Craig

 **Special town** :  
Cop: Token, Medic: Stan

~

 **kenny** : _*under his breath*_ More like the ranks of the dicks… it’s not paradise without titties.

 **jimmy** : We’re dwindling in numbers folks! Everyone close your eyes and hold tight for the deciding round! Mafia, open your eyes and decide on someone to kill.  
_*the mafia choose someone*_

 **jimmy** : All right, close your eyes again. Cop, open your eyes and decide on a check.  
_*the cop chooses someone*_

 **jimmy** : You know this by now, thumbs up for townsperson and thumbs down for mafia.  
_*jimmy gestures to the cop. the cop nods*_

 **jimmy** : Good, close your eyes again. Last but never least, open your eyes Medic and decide on someone to save.  
_*the medic decides on someone*_

 **jimmy** : Close your eyes again. Excellent job fellas! Open your eyes and let’s find out who wins this bitch!


	9. Round Three: play-along

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a play-along chapter. If you want solutions, please click ahead to the next chapter. 
> 
> In the last chapter of The South Park Mafia! 
> 
> **token** : Jimmy, we’re voting to execute Kenny.
> 
>  **jimmy** : All righty then. All in favour of executing Kenny? 
> 
> **Everyone** : _*raises their hands. it’s unanimous*_
> 
>  **jimmy** : Rest in paradise Kenny, you’re passing into the ranks of the dead.
> 
>  **kenny** : _*under his breath*_ More like the ranks of the dicks… it’s not paradise without titties.
> 
>  **jimmy** : We’re dwindling in numbers folks! Everyone close your eyes and hold tight for the deciding round!
> 
> Will this game be won by the town or mafia? Who can be trusted? Will Kenny ever see those glorious titties? 
> 
> Find out in the final round! _*dun dun dun*_
> 
> ~

**jimmy** : So after many years of being an upstanding citizen, Token finally meets his grisly end in the town of South Park. God rest his soul.

 **token** : The town’s counting on you guys! I know you can do it! 

**jimmy** : Let’s finish this with a bang, fellas! Go about your discussing! 

**stan** : So before anything else, I just want to say that I’m the Medic and-

 **tweek** : WHAT THE FUCK? NO! I’M THE MEDIC!

 **butters & craig**: _*exchange glances*_

 **butters** : Well, shit.

 **tweek** : You were right, Craig. I had suspicions but no real case against Stan. Now that he’s claiming Medic, everything he’s done all makes sense as mafia! 

**stan** : Don’t trust him! I’m the REAL Medic and Tweek is the last mafia! Please hear me out! I can lay out all the evidence if you just trust me!

 **tweek** : What evidence are you talking about? There’s nothing convincing you can possibly say!

 **stan** : Oh, there’s plenty. I could fill a whole book with evidence against you.

 **tweek** : Fine JK Rowling, go write fiction then. Make sure you add lots of useless canon afterwards.

 **stan & tweek**: _*rabble rabble rabble*_

 **butters** : What do you think, Craig? 

**craig** : I… I don’t know. I didn’t think this would happen.

 **stan** : Guys, think about it! It’s literally Tweek’s only option to counterclaim Medic! 

**tweek** : The same could be said for you, liar! 

**jimmy** : Okay I can see that we’re going to have a lot of yelling here if I don’t intervene. Stan, Tweek, I’ll moderate between the two of you so both of you can be listened to fairly. That sound okay? 

**stan & tweek**: _*exchange glares before nodding*_

 **jimmy** : Excellent! Craig, Butters, feel free to call out to me if you want a moment to talk amongst yourselves or decide on someone for execution. Understood? 

**butters & craig**: _*nod*_

 **jimmy** : Fantastic. Okay Tweek, would you like to make your first point and first point only? 

**tweek** : Uh, okay… so it’s like Craig pointed out before, Stan has only spoken to push the game along or ask what others think. He’s never contributed anything to the game unless someone suspected him. at least I’ve tried to be helpful by asking how many people we can afford to execute wrong. Any time I’ve stayed quiet is because I was afraid of drawing attention to myself as the Medic. I didn’t want to make myself an execution or night kill target.

 **jimmy** : Is that everything for your first point? 

**tweek** : I-I think so…

 **jimmy** : Okay then. Stan, your response? 

**stan** : Tweek, you say you’ve tried to be helpful by asking how many people we can afford to execute wrong. But that piece of information wasn’t all that useful to town specifically. I mean, the mafia benefit from knowing that information too. So it’s not really true to say that you’ve been helpful to the town.

 **jimmy** : All right, that’s your response finished? 

**stan** : Yeah.

 **jimmy** : Would you like to make your first point or wait to see what Tweek says?

 **stan** : No, I’ll make my first point now. So remember back in the first round when Clyde was executed during the day? 

**Everyone** : Yeah? 

**stan** : If you think back to then, Tweek was the one who agreed with Cartman about executing Clyde. If Tweek is mafia, that was an opportunity for him to look more town by agreeing with someone who would have definitely been checked first by the Cop. We all still agree that any Cop would have to be dumb to not check Cartman first, right? 

**butters & craig**: _*exchange glances and nod*_

 **jimmy** : Tweek? Any response to that? 

**tweek** : Everyone else agreed with Token once he confirmed Cartman’s identity! Why should I be singled out for agreeing with Cartman’s plan earlier on? Am I not allowed to think it was a good plan or something? 

**jimmy** : Stan? 

**stan** : The difference between everyone else agreeing once Token confirmed Cartman’s identity and you agreeing before anyone else is because you already knew that Cartman was town. Don’t pretend you didn’t!

 **jimmy** : Tweek?

 **tweek** : You’re only saying it like that because you’re trying to frame me! _*turns to Craig and Butters*_ Guys, at that moment I agreed with Cartman because I was trying to think ahead for the rest of the game! _*turns back to Stan*_ Which is a lot more than what you’ve done! You’re just mafia talking a lot so you can fly under the radar!

 **jimmy** : You’re doing really well keeping this civilised, gentlemen. Let’s keep that going until you’re both done.

 **stan** : If I’m trying to fly under the radar, then explain why I would claim medic, huh? That would draw way too much attention!

 **tweek** : Weren’t you listening before? I said it’s literally your only option to get the town on your side! I also think you’re trying to get everyone’s trust because of the argument you had with Craig in the last round! You were probably betting on the chance that the real Medic is dead so they wouldn’t be around to counter-claim. Well too bad, because I’m still here! 

**stan** : Well I said it before too! Claiming Medic is also your only option! There’s WAY more reason for the town to trust me over you because at least I’ve been talking the whole time! You’ve only spoken up here and there. You can’t just start speaking up when you have something to say because it’s all about the town working together to try and figure out who the mafia are. But that’s never been your agenda, has it? 

**tweek** : Your argument makes no sense at all!! Of course my agenda is to help the town! Why would I say something if it’s not going to be useful?! Otherwise I'd end up like you, under suspicion because you’ve been all talk and no substance! How hypocritical can you be?!

 **stan** : I’m not in this position because of that. Face it Tweek, I’m in this position because you attempted to counter-claim Medic and it’s not going well for you.

 **tweek** : Uh no? I’m not the only one who thinks you’ve been all talk! Craig literally just accused you of that at the end of the previous round!

 **butters** : If it’s all right with you fellas, could I have a moment to share what I think so far? 

**stan & tweek**: Yeah…

 **butters** : Craig, do you also have anything you want to say? 

**craig** : Yeah I guess so… I don’t think hearing them face off for any longer will be that much more useful. But can you go first Butters? 

**butters** : Sure I can. Now I hope none of you take offence to this because I know you’re both good fellas outside of this game, but right now I think that you’re both arguing in circles.

 **tweek** : He’ll say anything to keep you guys confused! It’s all he can do at this point!

 **stan** : Speak for yourself, mafia.

 **butters** : Right, but it’s not very town of you to do that. Especially you, Tweek. I hear your case buddy, but I haven’t heard you bring up anything evidence against Stan except that he hasn’t contributed anything.

 **tweek** : Because it’s hard to point out anything else when he hasn’t said anything meaningful! There’s no evidence trail to follow! It really is as simple as I’ve said! Besides, having a complicated argument would only be confusing to the townspeople!

 **butters** : Well yeah, that IS true…

 **tweek** : And that’s exactly what Stan’s doing! He’s trying to make a big deal of me agreeing with Cartman and saying I have all these underlying motives. I honestly just thought it was a good idea! 

**stan** : Oh COME ON! There’s nothing confusing about that argument! You JUST described it perfectly! No-one is convinced that you thought Cartman of all people had a good idea!

 **tweek** : You agreed with Cartman too! Are you suddenly back-pedalling on that?! Because it’s a bit late! 

**stan** : I already said it’s not about whether it was a good idea or not! 

**tweek** : Cartman also had suspicions about you and he turned out to be town.

 **stan** : His suspicions about me were early on in the game and weren’t based on any evidence whatsoever! 

**butters** : I hear you, Tweek. I really do. But I believe Stan. I trust him over you for one particular reason.

 **tweek** : What’s that?

 **butters** : It was what you said at the start of the second round that we should decide what to do without knowing who Token checked.

 **tweek** : I just didn’t know the rules. I don’t think I was the only one who didn’t know either, it’s everyone’s first time playing. I’m sorry if that made you suspect me.

 **butters** : I understand, but I don’t think not knowing the rules is a good excuse to suggest making a decision without useful information. Because of that, I think you’re the last mafia. Craig? Do you want to say anything?

 **tweek** : Craig please, at this rate they’re going to execute a townsperson if you don’t convince them not to! You have to believe me! 

**stan** : Craig. Dude, you’re the town’s only hope now! You need to make the decision we all know is right! 

**craig** : How am I supposed to make a decision when I’m not sure what I think?

 **butters** : What makes sense to you so far? You could start with that first.

 **craig** : Tweek, I want to ask you something. 

**tweek** : Yeah? 

**craig** : You said before that you had suspicions about Stan but no case against him? What were those suspicions?

 **tweek** : I was worried about him trying to direct the game and lead everyone. I was scared that he might be mafia trying to misdirect us but I didn’t want to speak out and get him executed in case he actually was town.

 **craig** : Yeah, okay.

 **stan** : Craig, come on! Make the right choice! 

**tweek** : Please Craig… we’re so close to winning! Please just trust me on this! 

**craig** : _*is silent for a few minutes. He speaks a while later*_ … Jimmy, we’re voting to execute Tweek.

 **stan** : YES! Thank you! 

**tweek** : WHAT??!! Craig NO! Why are you doing this?!

 **kenny** : Well that took a turn.

 **kyle** : This won’t be pretty.

 **craig** : Maybe you honestly thought Cartman had the right idea to execute Clyde, but that’s not like you. At least not the Tweek I know.

 **tweek** : What do you mean it’s not like me?! I want the town to win just as much as everyone else does! 

**craig** : I think you as a townsperson would have been a lot more cautious in case Clyde was a special role.

 **tweek** : You can’t be serious right now! We had to take that risk or the game wouldn’t have moved forward! 

**jimmy** : Hoo boy fellas, this is gonna be hard to watch. That said, all in favour of executing Tweek?

 **stan & butters**: _*raise their hands*_

 **jimmy** : I’m going to need a vote from you, Craig. Otherwise the vote will be tied. 

**tweek** : CRAIG I’m telling you this is a huge mistake! The mafia are going to win if you do this! You have to call off the execution! 

**craig** : I’m sorry, but I need to trust my gut.

 **tweek** : Trust your logic Craig! It’s never failed you before and it won’t fail you now! 

**butters** : Oh golly, he’s fighting so hard… poor fella. Now I’m second guessing myself…

 **stan** : Butters! Don’t pull out on me now! Come on, we have to stay united for the town!

 **clyde** : _*chuckles*_ Pull out…

 **token** : Dude, not now… 

**butters** : You’re right, Stan. I’ve committed to this now! FOR ALL OUR FALLEN COMRADES! 

**kenny** : All this about a game that doesn’t have real dying in it… 

**cartman** : What can I say, the townspeople are passionate about their fellow citizens. It feels so good to be the mayor of such honourable men.

 **kyle** : Fatass, please. 

**cartman** : Not that you would know, Kinny. Dirty mafia bastard.

 **kenny** : Dude, whatever.

 **tweek** : Since when did you trust Stan more than me anyway, Craig?! 

**craig** : Ever since he was the Medic? 

**tweek** : BUT HE’S NOT! Where’s your evidence of that?! 

**craig** : I don’t have solid proof, but I don’t think you’ve been acting as town as you say so I’m assuming he’s telling the truth.

 **tweek** : You never make decisions without being completely sure of the logic! Why are you doing this now of all times?!! You have the deciding vote for fuck’s sake!! Craig, his argument is making things a lot harder than they actually are! 

**craig** : Dude, you don’t need to point out that I’m deciding the vote! It’s not like I feel comfortable voting for you but it needs to be done! You argue in circles when you’re cornered, so please just stop…

 **tweek** : Fine… just know that the town’s lost now. There’s no coming back from this.

 **jimmy** : Excuse me fellas, there’s an execution still waiting to happen here. Can I count again? All those in favour of executing Tweek? 

**stan & butters**: _*raise their hands again*_

 **craig** : _*slowly raises his hand*_

 **tweek** : I can’t believe this…

 **jimmy** : Well Tweek, majority rules. God rest your soul. Gentlemen, I’m proud to say that one team has reached victory… 

**stan** : Come on… the town won. It has to be! 

**tweek** : The mafia won and you know it.

 **jimmy** : It’s been a pleasure being your moderator tonight. I hereby announce that the winners of this game are… th-… th-… theeee- _*he stammers*_

 **butters** : Oh hamburgers…

 **cartman** : Shut up Butters, he’s about to announce the winning team!

 **jimmy** : theeee- th- the townspeople!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **TOWN WIN**  
>  Town: 1  
> Mafia: 0


	10. Round Three: solutions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a solutions chapter. If you don't want to be spoiled, stop here now and click back to the previous chapter. 
> 
> In the last chapter of The South Park Mafia! 
> 
> **token** : Jimmy, we’re voting to execute Kenny.
> 
>  **jimmy** : All righty then. All in favour of executing Kenny? 
> 
> **Everyone** : _*raises their hands. it’s unanimous*_
> 
>  **jimmy** : Rest in paradise Kenny, you’re passing into the ranks of the dead.
> 
>  **kenny** : _*under his breath*_ More like the ranks of the dicks… it’s not paradise without titties.
> 
>  **jimmy** : We’re dwindling in numbers folks! Everyone close your eyes and hold tight for the deciding round!
> 
> Will this game be won by the town or mafia? Who can be trusted? Will Kenny ever see those glorious titties? 
> 
> Find out in the final round! _*dun dun dun*_
> 
> ~

**jimmy** : So after many years of being an upstanding citizen, Token finally meets his grisly end in the town of South Park. God rest his soul.

 **token** : The town’s counting on you guys! I know you can do it! 

**jimmy** : Let’s finish this with a bang, fellas! Go about your discussing! 

~

Solutions:

 **Who’s playing** :  
Stan, Butters, Craig, Tweek

 **Dead** :  
Kyle, Cartman, Kenny, Clyde, Token

 **Narrator** :  
Jimmy

 **Mafia** :  
Tweek

 **Regular town** :  
Butters, Craig

 **Special town** :  
Medic: Stan

~

 **stan** : So before anything else, I just want to say that I’m the Medic and-

 **tweek** : WHAT THE FUCK? NO! I’M THE MEDIC!

 **butters & craig**: _*exchange glances*_

 **butters** : Well, shit.

 **tweek** : You were right, Craig. I had suspicions but no real case against Stan. Now that he’s claiming Medic, everything he’s done all makes sense as mafia! 

**stan** : Don’t trust him! I’m the REAL Medic and Tweek is the last mafia! Please hear me out! I can lay out all the evidence if you just trust me!

 **tweek** : What evidence are you talking about? There’s nothing convincing you can possibly say!

 **stan** : Oh, there’s plenty. I could fill a whole book with evidence against you.

 **tweek** : Fine JK Rowling, go write fiction then. Make sure you add lots of useless canon afterwards.

 **stan & tweek**: _*rabble rabble rabble*_

 **butters** : What do you think, Craig? 

**craig** : I… I don’t know. I didn’t think this would happen.

 **stan** : Guys, think about it! It’s literally Tweek’s only option to counterclaim Medic! 

**tweek** : The same could be said for you, liar! 

**jimmy** : Okay I can see that we’re going to have a lot of yelling here if I don’t intervene. Stan, Tweek, I’ll moderate between the two of you so both of you can be listened to fairly. That sound okay? 

**stan & tweek**: _*exchange glares before nodding*_

 **jimmy** : Excellent! Craig, Butters, feel free to call out to me if you want a moment to talk amongst yourselves or decide on someone for execution. Understood? 

**butters & craig**: _*nod*_

 **jimmy** : Fantastic. Okay Tweek, would you like to make your first point and first point only? 

**tweek** : Uh, okay… so it’s like Craig pointed out before, Stan has only spoken to push the game along or ask what others think. He’s never contributed anything to the game unless someone suspected him. at least I’ve tried to be helpful by asking how many people we can afford to execute wrong. Any time I’ve stayed quiet is because I was afraid of drawing attention to myself as the Medic. I didn’t want to make myself an execution or night kill target.

 **jimmy** : Is that everything for your first point? 

**tweek** : I-I think so…

 **jimmy** : Okay then. Stan, your response? 

**stan** : Tweek, you say you’ve tried to be helpful by asking how many people we can afford to execute wrong. But that piece of information wasn’t all that useful to town specifically. I mean, the mafia benefit from knowing that information too. So it’s not really true to say that you’ve been helpful to the town.

 **jimmy** : All right, that’s your response finished? 

**stan** : Yeah.

 **jimmy** : Would you like to make your first point or wait to see what Tweek says?

 **stan** : No, I’ll make my first point now. So remember back in the first round when Clyde was executed during the day? 

**Everyone** : Yeah? 

**stan** : If you think back to then, Tweek was the one who agreed with Cartman about executing Clyde. If Tweek is mafia, that was an opportunity for him to look more town by agreeing with someone who would have definitely been checked first by the Cop. We all still agree that any Cop would have to be dumb to not check Cartman first, right? 

**butters & craig**: _*exchange glances and nod*_

 **jimmy** : Tweek? Any response to that? 

**tweek** : Everyone else agreed with Token once he confirmed Cartman’s identity! Why should I be singled out for agreeing with Cartman’s plan earlier on? Am I not allowed to think it was a good plan or something? 

**jimmy** : Stan? 

**stan** : The difference between everyone else agreeing once Token confirmed Cartman’s identity and you agreeing before anyone else is because you already knew that Cartman was town. Don’t pretend you didn’t!

 **jimmy** : Tweek?

 **tweek** : You’re only saying it like that because you’re trying to frame me! _*turns to Craig and Butters*_ Guys, at that moment I agreed with Cartman because I was trying to think ahead for the rest of the game! _*turns back to Stan*_ Which is a lot more than what you’ve done! You’re just mafia talking a lot so you can fly under the radar!

 **jimmy** : You’re doing really well keeping this civilised, gentlemen. Let’s keep that going until you’re both done.

 **stan** : If I’m trying to fly under the radar, then explain why I would claim medic, huh? That would draw way too much attention!

 **tweek** : Weren’t you listening before? I said it’s literally your only option to get the town on your side! I also think you’re trying to get everyone’s trust because of the argument you had with Craig in the last round! You were probably betting on the chance that the real Medic is dead so they wouldn’t be around to counter-claim. Well too bad, because I’m still here! 

**stan** : Well I said it before too! Claiming Medic is also your only option! There’s WAY more reason for the town to trust me over you because at least I’ve been talking the whole time! You’ve only spoken up here and there. You can’t just start speaking up when you have something to say because it’s all about the town working together to try and figure out who the mafia are. But that’s never been your agenda, has it? 

**tweek** : Your argument makes no sense at all!! Of course my agenda is to help the town! Why would I say something if it’s not going to be useful?! Otherwise I'd end up like you, under suspicion because you’ve been all talk and no substance! How hypocritical can you be?!

 **stan** : I’m not in this position because of that. Face it Tweek, I’m in this position because you attempted to counter-claim Medic and it’s not going well for you.

 **tweek** : Uh no? I’m not the only one who thinks you’ve been all talk! Craig literally just accused you of that at the end of the previous round!

 **butters** : If it’s all right with you fellas, could I have a moment to share what I think so far? 

**stan & tweek**: Yeah…

 **butters** : Craig, do you also have anything you want to say? 

**craig** : Yeah I guess so… I don’t think hearing them face off for any longer will be that much more useful. But can you go first Butters? 

**butters** : Sure I can. Now I hope none of you take offence to this because I know you’re both good fellas outside of this game, but right now I think that you’re both arguing in circles.

 **tweek** : He’ll say anything to keep you guys confused! It’s all he can do at this point!

 **stan** : Speak for yourself, mafia.

 **butters** : Right, but it’s not very town of you to do that. Especially you, Tweek. I hear your case buddy, but I haven’t heard you bring up anything evidence against Stan except that he hasn’t contributed anything.

 **tweek** : Because it’s hard to point out anything else when he hasn’t said anything meaningful! There’s no evidence trail to follow! It really is as simple as I’ve said! Besides, having a complicated argument would only be confusing to the townspeople!

 **butters** : Well yeah, that IS true…

 **tweek** : And that’s exactly what Stan’s doing! He’s trying to make a big deal of me agreeing with Cartman and saying I have all these underlying motives. I honestly just thought it was a good idea! 

**stan** : Oh COME ON! There’s nothing confusing about that argument! You JUST described it perfectly! No-one is convinced that you thought Cartman of all people had a good idea!

 **tweek** : You agreed with Cartman too! Are you suddenly back-pedalling on that?! Because it’s a bit late! 

**stan** : I already said it’s not about whether it was a good idea or not! 

**tweek** : Cartman also had suspicions about you and he turned out to be town.

 **stan** : His suspicions about me were early on in the game and weren’t based on any evidence whatsoever! 

**butters** : I hear you, Tweek. I really do. But I believe Stan. I trust him over you for one particular reason.

 **tweek** : What’s that?

 **butters** : It was what you said at the start of the second round that we should decide what to do without knowing who Token checked.

 **tweek** : I just didn’t know the rules. I don’t think I was the only one who didn’t know either, it’s everyone’s first time playing. I’m sorry if that made you suspect me.

 **butters** : I understand, but I don’t think not knowing the rules is a good excuse to suggest making a decision without useful information. Because of that, I think you’re the last mafia. Craig? Do you want to say anything?

 **tweek** : Craig please, at this rate they’re going to execute a townsperson if you don’t convince them not to! You have to believe me! 

**stan** : Craig. Dude, you’re the town’s only hope now! You need to make the decision we all know is right! 

**craig** : How am I supposed to make a decision when I’m not sure what I think?

 **butters** : What makes sense to you so far? You could start with that first.

 **craig** : Tweek, I want to ask you something. 

**tweek** : Yeah? 

**craig** : You said before that you had suspicions about Stan but no case against him? What were those suspicions?

 **tweek** : I was worried about him trying to direct the game and lead everyone. I was scared that he might be mafia trying to misdirect us but I didn’t want to speak out and get him executed in case he actually was town.

 **craig** : Yeah, okay.

 **stan** : Craig, come on! Make the right choice! 

**tweek** : Please Craig… we’re so close to winning! Please just trust me on this! 

**craig** : _*is silent for a few minutes. He speaks a while later*_ … Jimmy, we’re voting to execute Tweek.

 **stan** : YES! Thank you! 

**tweek** : WHAT??!! Craig NO! Why are you doing this?!

 **kenny** : Well that took a turn.

 **kyle** : This won’t be pretty.

 **craig** : Maybe you honestly thought Cartman had the right idea to execute Clyde, but that’s not like you. At least not the Tweek I know.

 **tweek** : What do you mean it’s not like me?! I want the town to win just as much as everyone else does! 

**craig** : I think you as a townsperson would have been a lot more cautious in case Clyde was a special role.

 **tweek** : You can’t be serious right now! We had to take that risk or the game wouldn’t have moved forward! 

**jimmy** : Hoo boy fellas, this is gonna be hard to watch. That said, all in favour of executing Tweek?

 **stan & butters**: _*raise their hands*_

 **jimmy** : I’m going to need a vote from you, Craig. Otherwise the vote will be tied. 

**tweek** : CRAIG I’m telling you this is a huge mistake! The mafia are going to win if you do this! You have to call off the execution! 

**craig** : I’m sorry, but I need to trust my gut.

 **tweek** : Trust your logic Craig! It’s never failed you before and it won’t fail you now! 

**butters** : Oh golly, he’s fighting so hard… poor fella. Now I’m second guessing myself…

 **stan** : Butters! Don’t pull out on me now! Come on, we have to stay united for the town!

 **clyde** : _*chuckles*_ Pull out…

 **token** : Dude, not now… 

**butters** : You’re right, Stan. I’ve committed to this now! FOR ALL OUR FALLEN COMRADES! 

**kenny** : All this about a game that doesn’t have real dying in it… 

**cartman** : What can I say, the townspeople are passionate about their fellow citizens. It feels so good to be the mayor of such honourable men.

 **kyle** : Fatass, please. 

**cartman** : Not that you would know, Kinny. Dirty mafia bastard.

 **kenny** : Dude, whatever.

 **tweek** : Since when did you trust Stan more than me anyway, Craig?! 

**craig** : Ever since he was the Medic? 

**tweek** : BUT HE’S NOT! Where’s your evidence of that?! 

**craig** : I don’t have solid proof, but I don’t think you’ve been acting as town as you say so I’m assuming he’s telling the truth.

 **tweek** : You never make decisions without being completely sure of the logic! Why are you doing this now of all times?!! You have the deciding vote for fuck’s sake!! Craig, his argument is making things a lot harder than they actually are! 

**craig** : Dude, you don’t need to point out that I’m deciding the vote! It’s not like I feel comfortable voting for you but it needs to be done! You argue in circles when you’re cornered, so please just stop…

 **tweek** : Fine… just know that the town’s lost now. There’s no coming back from this.

 **jimmy** : Excuse me fellas, there’s an execution still waiting to happen here. Can I count again? All those in favour of executing Tweek? 

**stan & butters**: _*raise their hands again*_

 **craig** : _*slowly raises his hand*_

 **tweek** : I can’t believe this…

 **jimmy** : Well Tweek, sorry to say but majority rules. God rest your soul. 

~

Solutions:

 **Who’s playing** :  
Stan, Butters, Craig

 **Dead** :  
Kyle, Cartman, Kenny, Clyde, Token, Tweek

 **Narrator** :  
Jimmy

 **Mafia** :  
None left

 **Regular town** :  
Butters, Craig

 **Special town** :  
Medic: Stan

~

 **jimmy** : Gentlemen, I’m proud to say that one team has reached victory… 

**stan** : Come on… the town won. It has to be! 

**tweek** : The mafia won and you know it.

 **jimmy** : It’s been a pleasure being your moderator tonight. I hereby announce that the winners of this game are… th-… th-… theeee- _*he stammers*_

 **butters** : Oh hamburgers…

 **cartman** : Shut up Butters, he’s about to announce the winning team!

 **jimmy** : theeee- th- the townspeople!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **TOWN WIN**  
>  Town: 1  
> Mafia: 0


	11. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tweek had a chance to exercise his excellent acting chops and what a performance it was! (Much better than me defending myself as mafia. In that position, I'm usually shitting myself!)

**cartman** : YES! YESSS!! _*singsong*_ NYEH-NYEH NYEH-NYEH NYEH-NYEH! You guys are the losers! HEH-HEH HEH-HEH HEH-HEH!

 **stan** : Shut up Cartman, they played well! It was really close at the end! Thank god Butters didn’t switch votes!

 **butters** : Hoh boy Stan, I’m glad I stayed on your side! Tweek, you were putting on a show there! It’s real awesome how you came up with that all off the top of your head! 

**tweek** : OH MY GOD! _*heavy breathing*_ That was so much pressure! Craig, your win was really well deserved and I’m sorry for yelling at you.

 **craig** : It’s okay Tweek, it’s part of the game. You were so convincing at defending yourself too. I really thought I’d made the wrong choice there. _*he's breathing heavily too*_

 **stan** : Dude I know right? You had the deciding vote as well! After what you said at the end of the second round I was honestly worried that you had already decided to vote against me!

 **kenny** : Tweek, well done for the last round! 

**tweek** : Gah! You gave me a heart-attack when you said that thing in the first round about me and Cartman being two mafia trying to kill an obvious townsperson!

 **kenny** : Haha yeah oops, sorry about that! I was trying to lay low and it came out the wrong way. 

**kyle** : Can we just take a moment to appreciate Token though! Without him making two excellent checks, things could have gotten a lot more confusing than they were!

 **token** : Ha, yeah. Though I think it was just luck that Kenny happened to be mafia.

 **clyde** : Token for MVP!

 **stan** : Also how smart was it that the mafia killed Kyle first? I mean, no offence Kyle but making everyone suspect Cartman in the first round? You guys weren’t kidding around! 

**kyle** : Yeah that was an awesome move! It sucked having to stay quiet for most of the game though.

 **cartman** : I have no idea how the mafia knew that everyone would suspect me, but that was well played gentlemen. Well played indeed.

 **kyle** : Jimmy, thanks so much for introducing us to this game and moderating as well. 

**jimmy** : No problem fellas. You all did really well for your first game.

 **clyde** : I want to see how good you are at mafia, Jimmy!

 **token** : Yeah! You’ve played before, right? It’d be awesome to see you play! 

**butters** : Yeah! Why, I’ll bet that Jimmy would be able to read everyone here!

 **jimmy** : I’m not psychic Butters, but that’s really nice of you to say.

 **kyle** : Why don’t I moderate the next game then? Just to make things less chaotic _*glares at Cartman*_ and give Jimmy a chance to play too?

 **jimmy** : Sounds good to me, Kyle! We can introduce some new roles too!

 **clyde** : What type of new roles? 

**jimmy** : I’m thinking we could add another type of special townsperson, but one who doesn’t play for mafia or town. They’re out to win the game for themselves entirely. That role is called the Village Idiot.

 **cartman** : Ooh, a Village Idiot. There are definitely some suitable candidates here. _*glances at Butters and Clyde*_

 **tweek** : Can we take a break between this round and the next? I still need to get calm! 

**stan** : Yeah okay. We’re nearly out of snacks anyway. Snack refill, everyone! Or pee break or whatever. Next round starts when everyone’s back so hurry up if you can.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And so it begins again...


End file.
